This post is part of a new series – my journal as we start our adventure to establish Humblebee Farms in the heart of the Lost Pine forest in Paige, Texas. You can start with Day 1 here!

Getting to Humblebeefarms has been a multi-year, complex, pain-in-the-ass adventure. To get here we have sacrificed much. We became crappy friends, passed on uncountable invitations and paused many of the hobbies we enjoy. Instead, we stayed laser focused on our goal: find a place we can call Humblebeefarms. Find a place where we can begin again.

And in September we finally did it. We finally have a place on the map that we can call home. But like all major life changes, this too came suddenly and almost uncomfortably abrupt. Everything we wanted was staring us in the face. Yet, we had to pause and ask ourselves: “is this what we really want?” Are we ready to make this big of a change now? Before we can dive in, we first need to wrap up our current life. All beginnings first start with an end.

The Lead Up

Years have passed preparing for this. My husband and I have spent countless nights talking through what our ideal place is. We knew we wanted land – as much as we could afford. And we knew that we wanted diverse mix of woods, water and fields. So it’s almost surrealistic to have finally found our place – with admittedly a lot more land than I thought we would end up with.

At first when people asked “what are you going to do with all that land?!?!” I didn’t know how to answer back. I felt a little sheepish about having 96 acres (seriously, 96 acres?!). But now I finally have an honest answer back; I am going to enjoy it. Why do I need a specific plan for each and every acre?

It is as if the human condition mandates that everything – including our own homes – must have a practical purpose. Otherwise, we are just “wasting” it’s potential. But the truth is that you simply don’t need a purpose beyond that of simple enjoyment. The land can be as it is and that is purpose enough.

Of course, we do have ideas about how we want to shape some of the land. Our plans include adding a large vegetable garden, planting an orchard, raising livestock and even growing rare and exotic plants (like ginger, black cohosh, ginseng and more). But we also want to allow space to let the land exist in its natural state. We will add trails, thin out areas with overgrowth of yaupon, remove invasives and plant natives.

The Intrinsic Value of Wild

The intrinsic value of nature is too often lost in hectic, modern life. And inside I recognize a personal need to be close to the rawness of the woods. I take silent pleasure in observing birds flitter haphazardly and hearing the sudden snap of brush as deer react to my presence. I find a much needed momentary pause in observing the flowing water of a trickling creek and silent awe as I witness the intricacy of a twisting vine or an unfurling fern frond. I find a strangely calming effect in the chaos of the cluttered forest vs. the structured order of city blocks.

For me, this is ultimate bliss.

All Beginnings First Start With an End

On our final day at Humblebeefarms we hurried to “close up shop”. We put away tools, did a final sweep through the cabin, installed a security light and topped off the bird feeders. We don’t know how long it will be before we return. But what we do know is that we can’t wait! So while today is goodbye, tomorrow may just be hello.